The Space Of Presence

How can I be here for you and for myself without my judgments and evaluations, and why would I want to?

In committing to being present in a relationship, I am basically saying that I am here for you and for myself without prejudice. The reason for suspending my interpretation and evaluation of an interaction is to create a new container. This container is a safe space to explore the inner experience, and therefore to encounter the meaning of the experience as it lives in me.

This level of clarity is grounding. In my relationship with myself it allows me to compare my inner experience against my thoughts and consider their accuracy. Correct them if they dont match and consider other interpretations. It further gives me the possibility to share about what I need and value.

In my relationship with another, the safe container facilitates my focus on connecting to the other person’s inner journey, and supporting him/her in getting the clarity they need about what matters to them in this experience.

In the non evaluative space there is a quality of benevolence that underlines a commitment to sharing the experience of life, as opposed to sharing our beliefs of right and wrong. This is not intended to erase morality. Right and wrong still exists, but it is seen through the lens of how it is serving or it is not serving life.

When I have the courage to self connect in this way, I give up having to prove anything and the ability to accept that there might be things I don’t see emerges. This initiates the willingness to become curious. Not knowing is to some degree an attitude of humbleness which may invite an openness to vulnerability. This invitation into each others vulnerability allows for something new to be created together. Or if this journey is done with oneself it allows something new to emerge.