from conflict to connection
Relationships afford us the opportunity to expand our experience of life, to meet life in ways we would have never dreamt of. We are in awe of the life that flows through the other. We are open and ready to witness. We call this experience falling in love.
However at some point the mind gets in the way, and we move away from this direct experience. It does not seem that we are doing anything to cause this change. It even seems that the other person is doing something. Very likely our spouse/partner or child also believes that the other is causing it. It is a human tendency to believe this when the relationship becomes more complex than the skills we have.
How do we find our way back to the experience of safety and bliss?
First by being willing to be with all there is in the space between us, the willingness to witness, to be present to oneself as well as the other. This seemingly simple decision opens the space for empathy. It is in this dance of empathy that we experience the bounty of life, and the gifts of the relationship.
What is Presence
Presence is the experience of being centered in oneself. This grounding experience that is our core when nothing disturbs us is presence. Being able to return to this core even when something stimulates us instead of reacting is being centered. Being in our center is achieved by letting go momentarily of evaluations, judgments, and expectations therefore being willing to receive the experience.
What is Empathy
When we commit to being present with our feelings and needs we let go of the struggle to find a solution and a space of calmness opens. The calmness is the result of acceptance. It does not mean that we will not do anything to change a situation. It just means that in this moment we accept what is the truth for ourself or the other person. This witnessing of oneself or another is empathy. Receiving empathy is experienced as an invitation to step further into one’s life.
Engaging the Dance of Life
Stepping into our life is being willing to encouter our deeper needs. If in a relationship we invite each others needs it becomes a dance. The flow of needs is the flow of life. In the body needs are experienced as longing and in the mind as values. Values is how we name what matters to us about life. To the degree that we can embrace ours and our partner’s feelings and needs with our presence, is the degree we are dancing with life itself.
Our Goal is to engage life fully
Connecting to Oneself
Sometimes you are conflicted. Perhaps you have to a make a decision, or you are simply frustrated. I can support you to look at the deeper layers of your needs and peel them one by one like an onion. Sensing into your needs this way will reveal the solution.
Connecting to Each Other
As you commit to presence and empathy, curiosity emerges. Curiosity opens the door to the realization that there is more to know about yourself and your beloved. This brings the possibility for deeper trust and intimacy. I can guide you in this journey.
Connecting to Our Children
Our children are important to us not only because we love them, but also because they are our contribution to the future. As young adults, they have the enormous job of linking the past with the future in a meaningful way. Learning connection skills during growth periods is important to the relationship.
SINCE WORKING WITH ESTEE I APPROACH CONFLICT IN A WHOLE NEW WAY.
MARION P.
ESTEE HAS HELPED US FIND THE THREAD OF LOVE UNDERNEATH OUR CONFLICT .
AARON F
Free 30 Minute Private Session
My name is Estee Aron, I am a coach whose focus is emotional literacy. These are my trainings:
- BS in Psychology
- Graduate of the LIFE Program with Robert Gonzales – Two year empathy training based on Marsall Rosenberg’s NVC
- Mediation Dojo – Empathy focused mediation
- Relational Life Institute – Couple coaching through conflict
- Eckhart Tolle School of Awakening – Teacher of Presence Certificate
- Ayurvedic Practioner – Registered with the National Ayurvedic Medicine Association
- Certified Occupational Therapist Assistant – Pediatric and Elder subacute Therapist
- Functional Diagnostic Nutrition -Practitioner ( FDN-P)
- Refuah Institute Professional -CBT Coach Training Program
- Brain Spotting -currently training
- Family Constellation -currently training
About Me
I grew up in Romania in the post Holocaust period. My parents were children survivors. They told me when I was young about their experiences when they were young. I became fascinated with the question: what happens when we don’t see the humanity in another? What is occuring for the person to whom the beauty of their own life or my life is not evident? Why is this perception not available to them?
